Because as you know, I am required by Venus law to turn everything into a competition. My four ESPN level sponsors this month just happened to be 4 girls I freaking love. How bout we play a little game shall we? The best part, YOU pick the winner!
How This Works:
I asked all 4 potential blateors to answer the same set of questions
Each blateor will be featured on their own day.
You tell me who I should go on a blate with.
I'll judge who is deemed the most eligible blator based on the number of comments on their post combined with the voting that will take place after the last blateor has spoken.
COOL LET'S GET STARTED KIDS.
And now for our first blateor....
Lisa from Two Martinis
So blateor #1: What is your idea of the perfect evening with me?
This evening would have to take place in Chicago, obviously! (I'm hoping with all of the millions of dollars you'll be generating in blog revenue you'll be able to fly here on a private plane.) Anyway.
1 - We would eat deep-dish pizza and drink beer (preferably Goose Island, since that's brewed in Chicago), because that's how every good night should really start.
2 - Since you need to get more interested in hockey (and I live in an amazing city which happens to have a team in the playoffs), we would go to a Blackhawks game where we would scream at players and chant 'fight, fight, fight!' even if no one is fighting.
OR if this blate was after hockey season we could go to Wrigley field and watch the Cubs from a rooftop where it's all you can eat and drink. Perfection.
3 - After the game we would wander into a bar and demand people be friends with us. We would do this by creating a drinking game and forcing people to play it. And this (of course) will get us lots of free drinks (martinis). At least that's how it plays out in my head...
I may or may not be crying tears of joy at the excitement of that potential blate. Next question.
2. Do you squeeze the toothpaste from the middle or from the end?
The middle, obviously. I'm sure this says all sorts of charming things about my personality, but my husband insists that it's a character flaw and always resqueezes the toothpaste from the end every.single.day. Wait, I actually just looked this up (the internet is so wise) and I found out that squeezing toothpaste from the middle of a tube indicates, 'You are usually very impulsive, in a hurry, you always rush through life and like to party and have a lot of fun.' Yep, that sums it up.
Question Number 3:
If you were hosting a game night, what games would you pick and why?
Telestrations. Because it is the best game ever (especially when drinking). And maybe Cranium, if I were hosting nerdier people. And then I'd move on to more classic drinking games like flippy cup and 'Circle of Death' and '@$$hole'. Ah, college flashbacks.
Wow, I am really impressed by your game knowledge, blateor number 1. That gets bonus points from me but, alas, that doesn't matter because the readers are picking my blate. Sorry bout cha.
Question Number 4 for my first blate contestant:
4. Who is your favorite reality television star and why?
There are just so many people to admire that it's hard to pick just one - especially with all of those seasons of Real Housewives! Aside from those 'characters', I'm currently loving Farrah from Teen Mom. That girl is truly a hot mess, but she's also a singer/author/porn star, and if that's not a winning combination, I don't know what is.
5. How would you impress my family and friends?
Well, if we're being honest, I'll probably end up getting drunk and telling them way too much about myself but they will love me anyway because I will be witty and charming and funny. Or they'll be horrified and offended by the things I say and then I'll still think they love me, so everyone wins!
If the whole 'talking' thing fails, I'll have to impress them by getting REALLY low while dancing to Lil Jon. And then most impressively, being able to get back up again!
What I will NOT do is encourage your friends and family members to take shots from straws. It turns out certain people :ahem: didn't like that whole experience as much as I do.
Yes. That is true. That was the grossest suggestion ever. Thank you for reminding me of that torture you put me through. You lose imaginary points that don't matter from me.
Question Number 6 for you Blateor #1
Besides me of course, who is your ULTIMATE BLOG CRUSH that makes you go weak in the knees?
The Bloggess. I love funny ladies (ahem, this is why me and you are meant to be bloggy friends / blaters) and she is HILARIOUS. So funny, in fact, that she actually wrote a bestselling book. Her tweets are hilarious, too.
And my final question for you blateor #1...
You've been a great sport. Thank you for playing.
What pickup line would you use on me in an effort to get me to come follow your blog?
"Hey, do you know that if you go and read my blog right now you can find out how to win tickets to every sporting event ever in the history of the world?" I think that would do the trick.
My husband's contributions (is that cheating? I hope not) to this question were "Follow my blog and I'll tweet your Twitter" and "You turn my software into hardware." I tried to explain to him that I wasn't going for sexual, but he insisted those are golden and will for sure win me the blate. I hope he's right...
Pick me, pick me, pick me!
-Lisa (Blateor #1)
Well that pickup line totally worked on me. I'm going to go check out her blog right now and you should too. Oh and blateor #1's TWITTER and INSTAGRAM Leave a comment here and let me know how you feel about Blateor #1...
I will now make this the longest but prettiest post in the history of the world by showing you some pictures I snapped from my work trip to Florida. Talk. About. Gorgeous. Oh, and please enjoy the lyrical stylings of the Beastie Boys while you scroll through. RIP MCA. Now #backthatazzup with muh guuuurrrlll Whitney.