Venus Trapped in Mars

01 March 2013

Indisputable Video Evidence... Drink!

Indisputable Video Evidence. 

I like this one. I like it because I tend to turn it into a drinking game. Every time the announcers say Indisputable Video Evidence, DRINK! 

And then within 1 minute and 37 seconds I'm hammered. 

The announcers will say this over and over again if there is a "questionable" call (a.k.a. ruling on the field)

During this time, the officials will take the time to review the play in their little video booth. 
image via
Indisputable Video Evidence: means that the video evidence must, without a doubt, change the officials opinion of the original call or ruling on the field.

Kind of like Walter immediately and without a doubt, overturned his original feelings about Kenya, once he realized in Anguilla, without a shred of doubt, that she was a psychopath. 
Image via
Who needs a bathtub that bad? I only get to use mine like once a week month every few months on days I take the time to clean it. You don't see me crying, now do you Miss USA? OR America? Or something.... Who the heck cares. 

Questionable rulings on the field include:

 1. Catches where the receiver may or may not be in bounds.
To be ruled In bounds: the player must catch the ball and have both feet (or even just toes) in bounds.

image via
You have your triple chi tea latte from Starbucks in your hand. You slip in your Jimmy Choo shoes on a wet spot, and you nearly drop your drink, but by some miraculous twist of fate you bobble the drink but still catch it without spilling a drop on you and manage to keep your balance without falling.

That could have gone either way, but because you are a magestic, graceful woman. You held on for the incredible grab. You go Glen Coco. Touchdown.  

2. If any part of the player touches the ground out of bounds before the rest of the body, they are ruled out of bounds and it is not a catch. It can be as small as this one finger shown below, and it will be ruled as an incomplete pass. 

image via
You are out getting bi-weekly your mani/pedi done. You have been waiting under the UV light for the allotted 10 minutes and you are late for cocktails with your bestie, Karen. So you carefully reach into your Tory Burch bag, slow as ever you pull out your keys and then feel yourself touch the side of your sunlgass case with your right index finger. 

@#$% <--crap. Out of bounds from the safe path of removing the fingernails without chipping them. No Touchdown.  

 (where the offensive player drops/loses the ball during a play and the other team is able to grab the ball)

Sometimes the player will be ruled "down" or "dead" if either knee touches the ground BEFORE losing the ball and the guy who fumbled won't get yelled at by the coach.

This is not the case for Mr. Jackson here... go to your room. 

There are several other reasons plays get reviewed and questioned by the officials. But these are the big ones, and should be enough info for you to get good and tipsy by playing my Indisputable Video Evidence Game. 

Because after all, a lady shouldn't have more than seventeen cocktails in one sitting. Sixteen is where I draw the line, you should too.
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