Venus Trapped in Mars Sports and Lifestyle Blog Dallas

05 March 2014

For A Smoother Twerk Curve

I had an entire, two-day, two-part post written out and ready to go for when I got to work this morning. I had planned on posting part one today and part two tomorrow. I was really excited about it. I just had to pick an image to use so people could pin the post (aka so I could pin the post). 

I sat down to look through my computer and find an image. 19 months of camera roll images and an hour later... Notta. Nothing. Zilch. I then came to the conclusion that this clearly means I care way too much about blogging. Or that I am horribly obsessive. Probably both. 

I don't do random-thoughts-in-my-head posts very often, but today, two guesses what you're getting. I don't know why I feel like I need a plan for every single post. It is ok to ramble occasionally, right?!

At work, we are building a new website. This is the most gigantic pain ever placed on marketing mankind. As you may know, I work in the marine industry, for a Japanese company that sells outboard boat motors. We produce about 30 different outboards, ranging from 2.5hp to 250hp. I need to come up with different sales blurbs for every single motor. And my brain isn't working. 

I'm really not a boater, but I'm trying really hard at learning to be one because I do love my job! Part of me feels like some extra, hands-on time on the water would help?!?! Don't you think?

You just never know what will be beneficial until you give it a try, right? So back to these sales blurbs. So far, here is what I've come up with, do you think these blurbs will be approved by the big wigs in Japan?

"That's a good lookin' outboard, let me get a better look"
              -- The Smallmouth Bass Now Hooked On Your Line

Let your girlfriend twerk to your torque. - but really, what is torque? I have no idea?

This motor gives you a broader, flatter torque curve..... for a smoother twerk curve-  I'm picturing Miley on the font of the boat while the boat torques, she twerks. I dunno. Help. 

"Can I get a ride on your new Tohatsu" 
            ---Tonight's dinner

"The Walleye can't believe the fuel economy!"

Someone please send help. Does anyone boat? And by boat I mean drive the boat, not sunbathe (or twerk) on the boat. I bet when you saw the title of this post you got really intrigued... I apologize for letting you down. See you tomorrow. 

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  1. i cannot help you with any of this excpet to say i understand the struggle of trying to find the perfect image for a post. it took me forever for my post today and the image is dumb. i do like the torque...?!

  2. HAHA I'd definitely buy a boat motor for a boat I don't have if those were the blurbs! However, I'm not a normal human being, nor do I boat so maybe I'm not the best judge! Good luck!

  3. I know we're supposed to be talking about boating here, but I have another question: you pin your own blog posts to your own Pinterest boards? Is that how that works when bloggers always talk about using Pinterest for your blog??

  4. the more times you can use twerk in a professional website the better i say. then again i do not run a professional website, i know nothing

  5. I can't be of any help, but I must say I almost snorted coffee out my nose at the "let your girlfriend twerk for the torque" comment. Thanks for that!

  6. I know what torque is.. but that's about as far as I can help ha ha! I'm a car and truck gal, I don't really do boats unless it is for tubing or sunbathing. I got a good laugh at the blurbs you've got so far!

  7. hahaha well I like them, but I don't know about the guys in Japan!

  8. Holy mother of no on the twerk one. Listen to the engineer over here and don't go with that. Maybe its just my personal preference but I know my man who is a boater would walk right away from that one. What about combining motorboating (the boobs version) with the boat motor? just an idea.

  9. hahahahaha. You crack me up!

    Also? I know very little about boating and cannot help you. Sorry.

  10. Literally have no idea about boats, but I know a LOT about puns, and girl, you got it goin on!

  11. while I appreciate your puns I am not sure the serious boater nor the japanese head guys will LOL
    But '' this motor will make you want to trout it from the rooftops" or "Artic Char you looking for a new Motor"

  12. Something about motor-boating and you're golden. haha good luck!

  13. All I know about boats is that I would love to be sunbathing on one right now.

  14. My boat is a wakeboard boat so it's quite different from some fancy one :) haha

  15. My dad actually is a huge boat person. Professional fishing guide & owned his own boat business, so I grew up on boats. I don't see those really working for guys looking to buy a boat. I know that probably doesn't help you sorry.

  16. Torque is the best thing ever. Trust me, you want a LOT of it. A twerk to torque ratio might be necessary.


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