Yesterday the feeling of back to school was all around me. Helene posted advice for her twin sisters who are headed off for their first year of college. The Texas Rangers sent me an email about $7 upper deck seats for the last weekend games before school starts (p.s. would anyone like to go to that?). Then the glitter guide posted some glam school supplies, then I had to clean the drool up off my desk at work.
I was in Pi Beta Phi at THE University of Tennessee. I was the recruitment chair one year... hey don't judge.... that looked fantastic on my first resume. I certainly have my fair share of recruitment knowledge, so I just wanted to offer some tips to the freshmen students going through recruitment!
I got news for you, you aren't better than anyone. I swear to God, when I hear girls talking about "the fat sorority" "the slutty sorority" "the drunk sorority" I want to punch them square in the mouth. We are all women, we are all doing the best we can. Give everyone a chance, be kind to whomever you speak to when you visit that house, even if you think you don't fit in their group.
6. It isn't the end of the world.
If you don't get your first or even second choice. I promise. You'll live. You'll make friends. Great friends. Life long friends. When you look back on college years later you won't remember the disappointment you felt upon opening that envelope on bid day and reading a card that said Phi Mu instead of Kappa Kappa Gamma. You'll remember getting ready with your sisters for that semi-formal junior year when you got the courage to invite the guy you'd been crushing on for months.
7. Choose Pi Phi.
Hehe :) just a suggestion.
1. Dress the part, but be yourself.
Each day has a different theme. The week starts off quite casual and progresses to cocktail attire as the week goes on. One thing I wish I had done in college was to dress for me, not for everyone else. I love my personal style, and I love to dig for the coolest pieces. Yet what did I use to put on in college? Ralph Lauren Polos and Oxfords. Now don't get me wrong, I love that look, but it just isn't me. Be true to yourself when picking your outfits, and have some fun! The more confident you are, the more you'll stand out. I guarantee you put on a sparkly little number, you are going to rack in the complements. I definitely wouldn't sex your outfits up too much, you're trying to win over girls, not dudes.
2. Speak Up.
You think you're nervous going in to talk to all these different girls, from different chapters that you have never met before? Well guess what, so are they! Maybe even more so because their job is to initiate the conversation and come up with questions to ask you. If you start asking questions to the chapter member you are talking to, I swear you will be her favorite of the entire day. It was like pulling teeth to talk to some of the the girls going through recruitment, I would have given my left arm to have someone control the conversation for a change.
3. Don't believe Stereotypes
Things you should never say to yourself during recruitment:
- I want the party sorority
- I want the sporty sorority
- I want the most philanthropic sorority
- I don't want that sorority they are a bunch of bitches
- I want the pretty sorority
- I want the rich sorority
Don't say that stuff. You know why? You will find each of those types of girls in every sorority on campus. My sorority had a group of girls that liked to party, we had a group that would dominate at intramurals (led by me #thankyaverymuch), We had a group that loved doing every philanthropic event we participated in, we had the pretty ones, we had some rich ones, we had some girls that worked two jobs in addition to being a full time student, we had big girls, we had small girls.... and guess what... we had some bitches too.
It doesn't matter whose group you choose, you will find your new best friends, the girls you want to spend the next 4 (4.5) years with in there somewhere.
4. Get RECs (Recommendation Letters) and lots of them .... or maybe don't!
Here is a story about two very different girls, that had very different approaches to recruitment. One girl came in with tons of recommendation letters for all the different sororities, she was prepared, knowledgable and excited for recruitment. The other didn't know what a recruitment was and thought she was going to intramural basketball tryouts. I'm sure you can guess which one I am. My point is that we both managed to find the same sorority which was coincidentally the best sorority for each of us.
My friend Magen who blogs here, and is now madam prezzz of her alumnae chapter in Charlotte wanted to offer some advice as well. Probably because she knew I'd be way too casual on this subject:
"My best advice to girls preparing to go through recruitment is to listen to the advice alumnae give you, to be prepared and have plenty of RECs. When asking for these RECS please ask for them yourself, do not make your mother do it, because you are an adult. Also, be polite to the alumnae that is writing you a REC, it is after all a favor they are doing to help you out. Remember to smile, be polite and dress appropriately."5. For goodness sake, if you do nothing else from this list, please be kind.
I got news for you, you aren't better than anyone. I swear to God, when I hear girls talking about "the fat sorority" "the slutty sorority" "the drunk sorority" I want to punch them square in the mouth. We are all women, we are all doing the best we can. Give everyone a chance, be kind to whomever you speak to when you visit that house, even if you think you don't fit in their group.
6. It isn't the end of the world.
If you don't get your first or even second choice. I promise. You'll live. You'll make friends. Great friends. Life long friends. When you look back on college years later you won't remember the disappointment you felt upon opening that envelope on bid day and reading a card that said Phi Mu instead of Kappa Kappa Gamma. You'll remember getting ready with your sisters for that semi-formal junior year when you got the courage to invite the guy you'd been crushing on for months.
Hehe :) just a suggestion.
