Venus Trapped in Mars Sports and Lifestyle Blog Dallas

18 July 2014

Everyone Loves a Rebuttal

There it is. In all its glory. 

I stumbled upon this on Pinterest while searching the similar pins listed below my Fantasy Football Team Names post (yes I have another one in the works for 2014). There was no link to an original website, it was simply uploaded by the user. Now everyone is entitled to their own opinion of fantasy football, I understand that. But this list just downright hurts my heart. 

Lets talk about it...

1. I Go Shopping All Day Sunday While My Husband Watches the Games
Ok, but when happens when the mall closes at 6pm and SNF doesn't even begin until 7pm? GASP! The horror. THE HORRORRRRRRR. He will force you to watch. I'm sure there isn't a single other television in the entire hose. No computer. No iPad. No iPhone live streaming netflix. No mall = forced to watch all the football. 
2. The House Looks Better When My Husband Doesn't Have Time To Fix It
Ungrateful much? I would adore a man that wanted to fix things for me. I'll have you know, the other day, I simply tried to change a single lightbulb in my closet. I first had to go out and buy a ladder. Then I climbed up, unscrewed the base of the fixture, and the entire thing some how came crashing down, wires hanging everywhere, stuffing popping out of the ceiling. I bet your husband would be delighted to come over, fix my closet light fixture, and spend the rest of the afternoon drinking beers, eating cheese dip and watching the cowboys beat the Deadskins with me. 
3. He Thinks I'm Watching the Game, But Really I'm Watching The Tight Ends
He doesn't think you're watching the game. He thinks you're watching the tight ends. 

4. The Only Scoring My Husband Thinks About is How Many Points Marshall Faulk Had
Marshall Faulk hasn't played in the NFL for nearly 10 years. And even in his last season, he wasn't the premier back for the team. I don't know who your husband is, but if he has drafted Marshall Faulk anytime in the past decade, I don't want him working on the electrical in my apartment. 

5. When He is Done, There are no Sprained Ankles
....and you lost me. 
6. My Husband Watches the Players, Not the Cheerleaders
He is still watching the cheerleaders. Men are excellent at multi-tasking when they need to be. 

7. I Get Out of Spending Sundays with My Mother-In-Law
If I had to guess, the feeling here is mutual. 

8. There is No Need to Rush Thanksgiving Dinner Because We Can't Eat Until The Games Are Over
Games aren't over on Thanksgiving until 11:30pm/Midnight if you're on the east coast. You're waiting that long to eat? That is just silly, make a plate and grab a seat on the couch. Watch the tight ends.

9. I Know on Sundays He is Not Sneaking Out to Play Golf
Ohhh, now this explains everything. I bet he is hitting the links with the very available, very retired Marshall Faulk. But they are called strokes in golf, not points. Just FYI. 

10. If My Husband Wins, I Take His Prize Money

That was a little harsh on my part. I'm sorry. I'll trade you Marshall Faulk in exchange for your forgiveness? We got a deal?

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  1. Totally agree with you on these. Jeremy and I look so funny when we watch cause we have both iPads up and 2 TVs on. One with Redzone and one with Cowboy game.

  2. haha, i really like this...while I am not the least bit into football or fantasy football, that list sucked. love the rebuttals, they had me laughing!!!

  3. Not even that into sports (although I did play fantasy football last year), but the pin still bugs me as being overly cutesy and gender divisive. (*giggle* I'm going to take his money and go shopping! Because, like, I'm a woman and that's what we do! Totes.) I'm glad you rebutt-ed it!

  4. what the actual fudge? i was reading that list and very little of it made sense. number 5 wtf? and damn number 2, rude bitch. i am getting irrationally mad about this.

  5. Oh my. Thank you for rebutting that list so I don't have to! This kind of pandering to women makes my blood boil (and blogs like your make me smile!!)

  6. Sounds like someone didn't do their research before making that weird graphic.

  7. I suck at fantasy football, but I LOVE watching the real thing. I get way to into it. My girls laugh that I'm screaming at the TV and telling them what to do, then cussing when they don't listen.

  8. He doesn't think you're watching the game. He thinks you're watching the tight ends.

  9. Ok I totally read this whole thing like "Why the hell did she post this" and then I realized you were roasting it and felt better.
    Let's make our own "10 Reasons WOMEN (not girls...) REALLY love Fantasy Football"

  10. Wow, just wow! I had pretty much all the same thoughts as I read through the list as well. I personally can't wait for Fantasy Football to start back up, I'm craving it right now!

  11. I find this kind of amusing especially cause in our house I am pretty sure I am the one who is more into football than my husband is!

  12. I couldn't get past the horror movie title font. bless her heart.

  13. Oh my goodness the Marshall Faulkness of it all. I get that some people are football widows, but hey find a hobby you really dig and go do it on Sundays.

  14. I LOVE this. I long for a guy that will come help me fix something in exchange for a huge pile of home made nachos and an afternoon watching football and drinking beer on me:)

  15. That was fantastic. I got nothing else; that was great.

  16. If I was a man, I'd totally marry you.

  17. I can't stop laughing! Thank you for this!

  18. 4 makes me so annoyed it hurts. Yes, please continue to perpetuate the stereotype that women dislike sex and never want to do it. And if you really do have problems with your husband's libido not matching your own, that is where conversation and (possibly) couples therapy help. There is no reason to be thanking sport for giving you a break from "scoring" of other types and I just - ARGH. No. I seriously cannot stand this entire idea that sex is something to grudgingly do and people keep making it out as if women think that jfc no.

    x Nicole Isabella

  19. I could hardly even get through the original list because it was making me so mad. Your rebuttal is perfect, per usual!

  20. Whoever wrote that list is a fool. First of all, football is very entertaining; especially college football. Love the breakdown, makes everything better.

  21. HA. Omg this is the kind of girl that has got to go in my book. I don't care if you don't watch football, but don't generalize like this. Football is entertaining, exciting, and cheaper than going to the mall.

  22. have you ever seen the jimmy fallon clip where he pretends to be a girl and just says eww a lot? that is what this girl must be like. hell no.


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