Venus Trapped in Mars

03 October 2013

A Bad Name + A Drinking Game

Say you have tickets to the opera. Your boyfriend makes it crystal clear that he would rather be anywhere but at the opera. But for some unknown reason, he tags along anyway, using up the only other ticket you had. He could have just said I don't want to go to the opera, take Kim with you instead and enjoy a night out with the girls. Martinis are on me. 

But instead he insists he goes with you to the opera because he doesn't want you to have all the fun without him, even though he has no interest and would rather be doing man things. While there, he pouts. He continuously checks his phone. He tweets things like, "The Opera is so dumb, I don't know what's going on, the girls look good in those tight pants though." He leans over and tells you how hot the main opera lady is. Instead of dressing in the appropriate formal Opera attire, he wears a Cleveland Browns jersey and face paint. 

After spending a couple of weekends going to baseball and football games here in Dallas, it was pretty darn clear why some guys would never willingly bring their girlfriend or wife to a sporting event. Yet so many girls that have zero interest in sporting events tag along just to be sure their man isn't having a lick of fun without them present. 

This isn't fair! You're ruining it for the rest of us who want to go to the games. You are giving us a bad name. What if I get your boyfriend next, after he dumps you? What if he decides to take his broseph Billy to the Cowboys Redskins game instead of me, because he knows, since I'm a girl, I will go to the game wearing a pink sparkly tutu, talk about how hot the players look in their tight pants, get hammered drunk off a drink and a half and feed him ultimatums during the two minute warning like, "Go and find me a wine vendor or else this relationship is over and I'm keeping the dog!"  

Per the usual, I'm ranting again on this blog space of mine about things that grind my gears. But really, I have proof this time. Check out the girls (and even a dude!) I saw that really should have just stayed home, picked up a bottle of wine and had a DVR marathon. 























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I want you guys to meet Danielle from Sweet Southern Girl! I sometimes offer up suggestions on guest post ideas for my sponsors, those suggestions include, but are not limited to, "Why don't you make a drinking game!" I get so excited when someone takes me up on that offer!

You guys will love Danielle because she is a wino (like us!) and even hosts a linkup on Wednesdays called Wino Wednesday! Be sure to go say hey girl heyyyyy on twitter too! 

Hi VTIM fans! I’m Danielle from Sweet Southern Girl and if you’ve been to my blog lately you’ve been hearing crickets. I’m getting married in less than three weeks and I’m going crazy trying to get everything done! I tried to think of a relevant drinking game and I finally got it.




Sip your wine anytime someone asks:

Where is your wedding?
What are your bridesmaids wearing?
What if it rains? (Outdoor weddings)
Where are you registered?

Finish that glass off and pour another when you hear:

So when are you going to start having babies?
What you should do is…
Well when I got married…

Pull out the moonshine when:

Your future mother-in-law says, “Well what if you did this…”
You misspell your fiance’s last name on the wedding invitations. (Yep, that was me!)
You send out a Save the Date and forget to send a wedding invite. (Not me, but a friend.)


Stop by my blog and say hey! All you winos come check out my weekly Link-up with High Heeled Love, Wino Wednesdays.

38 comments :

  1. This rant should totally makes me think Family Guy "You know what really grinds my gears". But it's such a good point, if oyu don't want to go, don't go, I'm sure homeboy can find a buddy to go with that will actually enjoy and appreciate the cost of a ticket.

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  2. Those pictures just made my day! And I couldn't agree more, those girls are ruining it for the rest of us!! For date number two with my now fiance I suggested we go to a local sports bar and watch the game. He was so confused and kept saying how we "should go do something that I actually wanted to do." It took me a solid hour to convince him that was exactly what I wanted to do.

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  3. When you say "this lady" are you referring to the one sucking face or the one with five fingers of bling on the jumbotron because they're both pretty ridiculous.

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  4. Bahaha those pictures. I'm glad I'm not the only person that snaps creepy pics of others ;)

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  5. OH wow..I have never been to a pro game..only college stuff and this is just wow!!!!! I see a ton of crazy stuff at Nascar races..these people would fit right in!

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  6. That is absolutely hilarious becomes of how true it is! I definitely agree. Some of us ACTUALLY like going to sports event and the other girls ruin it for us. This is stuff we should learn in high school rather than biology! "Proper conduct at a ball game 101" Can you imagine?

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  7. The selfies.. come on.. we are here to watch the game lady!

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  8. this is spot on. this drives me NUTSO too. please just do us all a favor and... give me your ticket! ugh. i may not be the biggest sports fan in the world but when I'm at a game, im at a game. im cheering. Im watching and paying attention. i am with you on this 100 %!

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  9. These girls (and guys) really do ruin it for the rest of us. I'm not a big hockey fan but when I go see the Canes I wear red and black appropriate attire and I watch the game. Meanwhile, other girls show up in mini-skirts and then complain the whole time about being cold while they take 'adorbs' selfies.

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  10. That lady at the end....yeowzers get a room already, ewwwwww.

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  11. Oh my goodness those pics are hilarious! I don't understand those girls. I'm into some sports but not all and you better bet if J wants to go out with his buddies, I'm all about heading out with my girlfriends.

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  12. Im crying laughing!!! I havnt seen a jersey dress since umm 01' maybe..and homegirl slobbing her man down should have called it a day!

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  13. I love this!! It's hilarious!! I see this everytime we go to a game. :)

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  14. Is it wrong that I hate the woman sitting all spread out with her fuzzy blankie and bare feet!?! I know she's just making herself comfortable BUT we all know she has daughters just like her.. probably worse at home. OR they're the ones at the hockey games I see.. with their boobies and curled blonde hair bouncing to the techno music in between whistles, freshly manicured nails, texting on their diamond studded pink iphones wishing that they weren't sitting at the BEST SEATS I'll never afford at a game I actually want to be at!!!!
    BAH! Thank you for venting how I feel.. !!

    The opera comparison was pretty genius too by the way;)

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  15. lol! I love the pciture of the girl raping her guys face. Who doesn't do that shit in public? I mean, doesn't everyone? I have to admit though, I do wear some girly stuff to ball games, be it football, baseball, or soccer. But I feel as though I am allowed since I do like and enjoy the sports,

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  16. girls are the worst. stay home and gimmie yo ticket. also, big pet peeve when people wear jerseys of other teams to games. dumb.

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  17. These people infuriate me. At least act like you are interested! I always think about how they are wasting a perfectly good ticket.

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  18. Why does the lady in the first pic have her shoes off? Bitch, you aren't at home.

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  19. As an NHL season ticket holder, I see these kinds of biddies all the time and it's infuriating. "Is this almost over?" ..or they just get sloppy-drunk in their boredom and whine the whole time-- lady, I'm trying to watch the game!!

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  20. Gosh, you're funny! This post and these pics had me hollering! My husband's best friend bought my daughter a jersey dress when she was little. That ish wasn't cool then either!!

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  21. hysterical!!!!.... those people would annoy me too!... especially the make out & the selfies. You're bothering me, I'm sure you're bothering your man. Also, that guy probably thinks it's okay because it's "Brett Farve", but it's not.

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  22. YESSSSS, all these and girls that act intentionally dumb at ball games and ask questions constantly. Just, no.

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  23. people who take pictures out in public with their ipad look like idiots. harsh, but that's what i think.

    i know someone who claims to be a HUGE basketball fan but when they're at a game, their facebook is littered with selfies AT THE GAME.

    -kathy
    Vodka and Soda

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  24. Omg, the multiple rings, jersey dresses, THAT woman...thank you for curing my want to snack right now. I may lose a pound thanks to you. Oh and the iPad filming, just wrong. Someone filmed an entire pre-k graduation w one lat yr and was in everyone's way. We all had to duck under and around her.
    Xoxo lauren

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  25. CLE Browns jersey, woot woot!!!!

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  26. I LOVE going to sporting events but agree that some people just ruin it for everyone. I was at the Patriots game a couple of weeks ago and the woman in front of me legit asked her boyfriend what period it was. GO HOME!

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  27. That lady seriously took off her freaking shoes? Did she think she was at home?

    Also, did that couple have sex at the stadium? Cause she looks like she's about to mount him. Just sayin.

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  28. Hahaha fabulous analogy! I'll have you know I am never that girl.. and the time we went to TopGolf doesn't count because I legitimately thought I was going to die.

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  29. I'm such a weirdo girl. I take my teams so seriously. Like don't talk to me, don't touch me, the Buckeyes are on TV. Oh they aren't playing? Then I must pay close attention to the talking heads analysis. No seriously didn't I say don't touch me?!?!?! Even Boomer knows...talk to mommy on commercials...or when the game is over...but only if we won.

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  30. I couldn't love this post more. Those kind of girls ruin it for the rest of us.

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  31. Wait, lol .... "is this real life?" ... I can't even believe that you captured all of this goodness in one game HAHAHAHA!!!!!

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  32. hahahahah oh my gosh. Classic, and I love this.
    I do like baseball butts though, and I do go to look at them, and of course watch the game! ;)

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  33. hahahaha this is allll so true! but people watching is one of the most entertaining parts of a sporting event (you know, right up there with the actual sporting event ha), thanks to all those crazies up there!

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  34. that jersey dress makes me want to puke. And you didn't Favre was a baseball player? Also a golfer, jeans spokesperson, and master lawn mower. :)

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  35. You should have spilled a drink on the jersey dress. That's just wrong.

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