Female Fan Does Not Equal Kitchen

Here's something crazy.... my favorite week of the year is also my least favorite week of the year. 

Super Bowl week for a sports fan -- I don't care if you're a girl, a guy, my 90 year old grandmother or my beagle General, a sports fan is a sports fan, no matter the gender-- should be the most exciting week of the year. The only other time of year I think could rival that of the Super Bowl, is March Madness, which I also go giddy for. 

"So, why is it your least favorite week of the year then, Sarah?"

I don't get easily offended by most things in this world, I really don't. I mean, I laugh at pretty much everything that Beige Cardigan and the Fat Jewish post on Instagram. What DOES offend me though is anytime someone equates being a "female fan" with the kitchen.

My friend Jessica sent me this article knowing I'd feel the exact same way she did about it. She was correct. The headline talks about how this company in particular is trying to reach "Female Fans" with Super Bowl social effort. 

The article starts by saying advertising during for the Super Bowl is male oriented because brands haven't figured out a way to reach female fan viewers. Do you want to know their plan on how they're going to reach female sports fans??? Do you?

By encouraging them to use the hashtag #gamedaytraditions and sharing Super Bowl Party hosting tips. This is how they plan to reach the female sports fan. LOLZZ! 

The fastest way to piss off a female sports fan is to equate watching sports with being in the kitchen. I don't know about you but I don't have a television in my kitchen. Would you like to know how much cooking I did this year during football Sunday? None. Not one second. We ordered pizza literally every Sunday because neither of us wanted to miss a second of the game. 

Are you an advertiser who wants to market to female fans? Do you want to know how? I'll tell you how, it's quite simple. 

Treat us like one of the boys. Take the 30 second spot you'd do for your male audience, and replace the male actor with a female. Boom, that's it! I kid you not, that's all you have to do. We are just like one of the guys you're trying to reach. We know the sport as well as they do, and we want to do all of the things that the boys do during the game. 

We want to eat wings.

We want to drink beer.

We want to eat pizza.

We want to look at the cheerleaders -- I'm not joking, we all want to look because we want to be them... girls are weird, I'll give you that.

We want to win money in Draft Kings. 

We want to win our fantasy league.

We want to throw things at the Television when our QB gets picked.

We want to scream uncontrollably when our RB kicks on the jets... He gon. 

We want to watch the pre-game.

We want to watch the post-game.

We want to argue with the opposing fans.

We want to support our team for every single second of every single game.

Just like the boys. 

I would die if these commercials aired female actors in place of the original male actors. I. WOULD. DIE. 

We want to steal the fence from the front yard again because it worked great last game, and have our husband who is at home drinking coffee get mad at us when he sees the fence is gone again.

Whaaaa? Woo, Go Cardinals! 

We want to hand our sleeping baby off to our husband and race outside to let our emotions out, slamming repeatedly on the horn in our car. 

YAH TEXANNNNNNNNNNNS! 

We want the only words we ever say to be "Discount Double-Check" because we love Aaron Rodgers so much.
Discount Double-Check...Discount Double-Check...Discount Double-Check...Discount Double-Check...Discount Double-Check...Discount Double-Check...

We want to sit in the stands holding weird dolls with the highest amount of certainty that we are single-handedly leading our team to victory. You're welcome that we are your fans, team. 

We want to welcome, with open arms, the chick that brings Tostitos to the party even though we really don't know her. We will call her Cindy, among other nicknames like: 
"Cindy-Mindy-Lindy-Loooooooooo" and 
"Cind-ayyyyyy My Ride Or Dieeeeeeeee" 
....Only to find out that her name is Katie.    
Hayyyyyy GIRL HAYYYY, Kat-ayyyyyy! 

We want to stuff our face and guzzle beer with our bestie at B-dubs

We want to make the ultimate sleeper pick...

We think Aikman's touchdowns were unbelievable.

I think you advertisers should get the point by now. 

If you so desperately want to figure out the super secret code for reaching the "female fan" just think of us like you do all of your other fans. We aren't in the kitchen, we aren't wearing pink jerseys, we aren't nagging our husbands to take the trash out with 2 and a half minutes to go in the 4th quarter. 

We are eating pizza, watching football all day long, wearing our favorite player's jersey in our favorite team's colors, drinking beer and screaming at the top of our lungs at our idiot left tackle who keeps letting our quarterback get BLASTED. 

So there. You're welcome. Now you have all of the information you need to advertise to us. 

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The Most Exciting News Ever (Yes, Ever)

^^^ yes this news involves this team ^^^

I have a hard time keeping up with twitter these days. When I first started blogging, I didn't follow that many accounts, so it was pretty easy to keep up with my feed. Over the years, through giveaways and blogging connections, I've collected nearly 800 accounts I follow. It feels impossible to keep up with my timeline, and it's rare that I see tweets from the accounts I originally followed. I prefer scrolling Instagram and Facebook throughout the day, predominantly leaving my twitter tab open to the interactions page. 

A few weeks ago though, I just happened to scroll through my twitter timeline and there sat a tweet from the Dallas Cowboys about a contest for Female Fans to submit their Gameday Rituals. 

Calling all Female Fans! Submit your game day ritual here: https://t.co/W43DO30Qkw pic.twitter.com/jE1LWinHwr

— Dallas Cowboys (@dallascowboys) September 3, 2015

I of course lost my (for absolute lack of a better word) shit, because this was my wheelhouse.

Female Fan + Female Fan Rituals + Writing + Dallas Cowboys = Sarah's Wheelhouse. 

Per the usual, I didn't carefully read the directions and I just started writing and typing as fast as my mind and fingers would let me go. I had the perfect story I knew would win. So I typed this whole thing up, thought it was the bomb, then attempted to edit my story down to 500 words.

I somehow managed to cut out about a million very important details and.... voila.... 500 words ready to go about my Female Fan Gameday Ritual! 

Then I realized it said 500 characters.

Womp womp womppppppp....

I went back to the drawing board and was forced to cut out every last thing that I thought made the story stand out from the crowd. I submitted my 500 character story and felt sad. 

@dallascowboys I thought it said 500 WORDS... I hope my story was still as good after chopping down to 500 CHARACTERS! 😜

— Sarah Webb (@iamsarahwebb) September 3, 2015

A few weeks passed and I decided I didn't win. Meh.

Until I got an email that went something like this... (I'll paraphrase here to save time)

"You won."

And then I screamed at a volume I didn't think I was capable of reaching and terrified General who was sleeping on my lap at the time. 

I don't want to give away too many details about the story itself, but it will be filmed and aired at Dallas Cowboys games on the Jumbo Tron (holy fudge), on their blog built specifically for female fans called 5 Points Blue, and across the Dallas Cowboy's social media channels. There are also some other sweet prizes that come with it, like Cowboys tickets, merchandise and even some cash money! The video is hands down the coolest to me though! 

Tomorrow they'll be filming the first part of the story at my house, so I've been scrambling to make my office look like I didn't just move in a couple months ago. The second part of the video will be filmed at AT&T Stadium next weekend, at the Patriots vs Cowboys game. 

I'm very nervous and ridiculously giddy. It's one thing to go out and take blog pictures, but video? That will be very new for me. 

I hope you guys will follow along with me this weekend as we film the first part of the story. I'm going to hand the phone and camera off to CB so he can document behind the scenes on Snapchat and Instagram! 

Eeek... HOW BOUT DEM COWBOYS?!?!

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Roll Call || Rep Your Team

As I was doing my daily song and dance of, "What On Earth Am I Going to Post Today?" an idea came to me that got me very excited. I posted a roll call to rep your team on instagram the other day, and so many of you responded in support of your team. I thought, what better way to connect fellow fans than to compile a list of bloggers (and non bloggers!!) sorted by fan base! 

This spur of the moment idea seems as if it might be incredibly time consuming on my end, but I don't even care I think it sounds like such a fun way to connect with your fellow fans --- and rivals!
All I'll need you to do is fill out this google doc below. List your favorite teams in any category, if you don't care for a specific sport, simply leave it blank. I also ask that you include a SQUARE picture of yourself, if you don't mind! This is how I'll be designing the pages for your specific team to flow cohesively! Your image and a clickable link to your blog will be included under your team's section, making for some good free advertising too! 
If you aren't a blogger, please come signup too! Just list either your Instagram or Twitter handle instead! 
I wish I could say this project has been MONTHS IN THE WORKS, but I quite literally just thought of it and this is how my brain works: 0 - 100 real quick. With that said, I don't have a cool name for this yet, but I'll work on that. 
I'm hoping this will be a bomb way for all of us sports fans to connect and make new friends, or, like I mentioned earlier, enemies.... muahhahaa! So please fill out this form, I've spent several minutes working on this idea, I would hate to see it be a flop. Holler if you have any questions or if I messed up on the form, which is likely. 

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Warriors vs Cavaliers // The Girl's Guide to the 2015 NBA Finals

Ruh rho, a sports post and it isn't Fan Friday. Hide yo kids, hide yo wife. 
I have to do it though, because the NBA Finals begin tonight! CB and I rarely missed watching a Mavs game all season, and even got the opportunity to attend two playoff games. When the Mavs fell out of contention, I found myself watching and enjoying the playoffs this year. I quickly formed a hatred for the Rockets and Cavs, and a deep love of Golden State. 
So today I thought I'd do a rundown of the 5 Things You Need to Know Before You Go --- NBA FINALS EDITION.  I'm going to go ahead and warn you, there may or may not be some personal bias splashed in here and there. 

Who is Golden State's best player? Steph Curry

image via    Plain and simple, the NBA's 2015 MVP is fun to watch. Rather than pump you with statistics (go ahead and assume they are insanely impressive, because they are) I figured I'd show you what he can do with the ball. 
He can shoot good. 

And pass good

And has learned to do other stuff good too.

You guys all already know who this is...

 image via
Plus Mr. James is no stranger to Venus Trapped in Mars, nor is his headband. Yeah, he's good, averaging 30 points, 11 rebounds and 9 assists in the Eastern Conference Finals vs. Atlanta. Yada yada yada..... If you like that kind of thing. 
Can you spot the bias yet???? 

I really don't like this guy. His name is Kendrick Perkins and he plays for the Cavs. 

 image via I should warn you, knowing who Kendrick Perkins is really isn't going to help you be more knowledgable in the game. He doesn't start and only averages about 9 minutes and 2 points a game.   BUT.... Knowing who he is will keep you entertained. Kendrick Perkins scares the piss out of me. Literally, they show his face, and a little pee comes out I get so frightened. This site even agrees with me.   So I have a drinking game for you... anytime they show Kendrick Perkins, either on the court or on the bench, and you feel mildly frightened, you have to drink. You'll be hammered in no time.... and need a nightlight. 

The Cavs are injury riddled. While yes, LeBron is healthy, they can't say as much for their two other best players. Kevin Love is out for the rest of the season with a dislocated left shoulder. Kyrie Irving, the Cavs point guard, has been battling tendinitis in his left knee. Kyrie, and everyone in wine and gold, say he's just fine.  We'll see. 

Watch out for the refs.  Technicals have run rampant so far in these NBA finals. In my honest opinion, the vast majority of the technicals called, were the right call. These guys are rough, and easily angered (see exhibit 3 on this list). The refs have been calling tight games, with many many breaks in play for free throws.  Who stands to benefit from nit picky refs? Golden State! They are excellent defenders, and keep it relatively clean. The Cavs are very physical, too physical at times. Constantly sending Steph Curry to the free throw line could cost them if they're not careful.   So now you guys are ready! Who do you have to win the whole thing this year?  Game 1 of the NBA Finals starts tonight in Oakland at 9pm EST on ABC. 

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The Novice's Guide to the Mayweather vs. Pacquiao Fight

I remember watching boxing with my dad when I was a kid. I don't know why I remember this from my childhood, but I do. I remember the trainers handing their boxers smelling salts, super soaker-ing (technical term) water into their mouths and patching up the deep gouges in their faces in between rounds. Their eyes would be so swollen that it looked like giant marshmallows were stuck under their eyelids, trying to push their way out.  I know you're assuming that I'm an expert in boxing since I've gotten punched in the face at a bar, but I'm not. I guess I'd classify boxing in with Nascar, the idea is pretty simple and you don't need to be an expert to understand two guys punching each other in the face.  This weekend, about 90% of the dudes in your life will be spending their Saturday evening watching the Mayweather vs Pacquiao fight. It isn't just any fight either, it is the most important fight (so I hear) in the last 30 years. I spent the last couple weeks learning everything I could about boxing, in hopes to make Saturday night a little more bearable --- dare I even say exciting --- for all of us! 

Ok let me tell you something that will make you feel better. The judges hold all of the power. They don't have to give any explanation on how they deduct points, or how they choose a winner. The above are just the guidelines that the judges follow how they see fit. I will say, one of my favorite parts of watching sports is calling a penalty before the refs do. Makes me feel like such a badass! Guess you can't do that in boxing!  So, true story, you will not know more or less about the match's scoring than anyone else watching. That is pretty darn cool if you ask me! Actually, you'll prob know more because you just read this. I feel like an expert already.  If I've confused you at any point, which I'm sure I did, holler with any questions in the comments section below! I'll do my best to answer, or find the answer!  Where is everyone watching the fight tomorrow night?!? I hope with a cold beer and some good company! 

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• Write a post about anything listed here
• Grab a button. (It's glittery, would you have expected anything less?)
• Link up EVERY FRIDAY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE
• Follow me so we can be friends
• Meet new friends who also like sports and being a fan
• Hop, hop, hop.... hop around.

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What to Wear to a Major League Baseball Game // Texas Rangers

What to wear to a MLB baseball game.

Let's play a game of raise your hand. Never played before? It's ok, it is real easy to pick up. Just answer the questions by raising your hand. Ok, ready?
Raise your hand if you have a select few vacation days at work, so they must be used wisely...  *raises hand* (See, easy right?)
Raise your hand if you are using one today

*raises hand*
Raise your hand if you are using a precious vacation day today  to go to your MLB team's home opener *raises hand*

Raise your hand if you are gonna eat this today

*raises hand*  Raise your hand if you are maybe gonna eat this today too

*raises hand*

All of the hand raises, because it is MLB opening day in Texas y'all, and I'm going! You may not believe this, but I've never been to opening day before. As much as I love baseball, I'm ashamed to even say those words out loud. So when CB was offered ONE ticket from a friend, I wasn't about to let him text me all day with, "wish you were here" messages. I promptly went to Stubhub and purchased a $53 standing room only seat. Worth it. 
But what to wear??  Well, that's the easy part! 

All of the Rangers gear shown is from one of my favorite sites for logo apparel, Fanatics. I love everything they offer, from cool Tennessee Vols vintage tees, to Cowboys jerseys and most importantly at this very moment, Rangers gear!  Fanatics is the largest retailer of officially licensed sports merchandise and provides the ultimate shopping experience to sports fans! 

Their site is really easy to navigate, I may or may not have popped over to the Atlanta Braves page too. What? I grew up a Braves fan, I can't just quit them overnight! 

Shown above: 

// Rangers V-Neck Shirt (on sale!) // 

Also bought this shirt, which I'm sure you'll see me wearing later this season!

  // Rangers Pennant //
// Travel Mug (on sale!) // Pro tip: coffee is necessary, we will be tailgating at 8am

 

 

    // Texas Rangers Hat //   I also own this one too -  shown in that picture of me eating bacon on a stick... (bacon on a stick not included, sorry.)

Don't forget the bubble gum, Big League Chew comes highly recommended.   
Not going to be at the ballpark tomorrow?  Suckaaaaaaaaaaas -- JK LOL LYLAS.
Instead, follow along with me on Instagram and watch me eat bacon on a stick.  While you're at work. I'll be eating bacon on a stick. While you're at work. MUAHAHHAHAHAHA



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• Write a post about anything listed here
• Grab a button. (It's glittery, would you have expected anything less?)
• Link up EVERY FRIDAY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE
• Follow me so we can be friends
• Meet new friends who also like sports and being a fan
• Hop, hop, hop.... hop around.

I was selected for this opportunity as a member of Clever Girls and the content and opinions expressed here are all my own.

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