Venus Trapped in Mars

10 October 2013

Does this make me a bad person?


1. I always take more than one paper towel while using the "wave hand in front to dispense paper towel" thingy.  
Don't even try to tell me one paper towel square dries your hands. 

2. I don't recycle
I barely have any room for my one trashcan to fit in the pantry. Let alone 47 different bins for my 47 different types of recyclables that need to be sorted by material, size, shape etc... 

3. I'll never let a driver over who stayed in the lane that exits too long. 
Oh hell no. This is the worst thing about Dallas. I never had this problem in Knoxville. People will ride out the right "Exit Only" lane until the very last minute and literally stop in the middle of the highway pleading with people to let them over. Causing a traffic jam not only in the lane that exists but also now in the left lane. No I'm not letting you over, you jerk. Learn to wait in line like the rest of us. 

4. I think hand sanitizer is for paranoid people.
 Germs are everywhere, hand sanitizer won't save me.

5. I tell the pizza man, "WE would like to order a large stuffed crust pizza and breadsticks"
There is no we. It is just me. And I really like pizza. A lot of pizza.



6. I think people who say they lose weight when stressed out are lying.
If you were for real stressed out over life, you'd be telling the pizza man that you and your 7 roommates need a few extra sides of marinara.

7. I enter mega bitch mode when someone argues with me.
I only argue when I know I'm right. You're wrong, I'm right. Shut up. Otherwise you are going to get mega bitch Sarah. Mega bitch Sarah is a stuck up little snotty know-it-all brat, she isn't a fun one to deal with.

8. I'm absurdly cocky
But just when I know I'm good at something. Like badminton. And fair basketball. And life. JK LOL

9. I get mad at girls I've never met 
Because she dated Tony Romo. Because she has a middle name that annoys me. Because she is from Alabama. Because she signed up for badminton also.

10. I'm a ranter
I'm 98% certain my friend Lisa doesn't read this blog and will never see this, but, yesterday I sent her a 12 page long furious, insanely angry ranting facebook-related text message. Her response was "I have no idea what you speak of." After that I felt like a moron for ranting about someone's silly status update. Who the heck cares?! But sometimes you just need to start typing or you'll never feel better. Perhaps I will remember next time that no one cares but me. Stop ranting. 





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If you haven't seen the pink cleats scattering the football fields of every NFL game or the umpteen amount of pink ribbons floating around Facebook lately then you might not know that it's Breast Cancer Awareness month. But have no fear because Erin from Two Thirds Hazel got a whole bunch of bloggers together to bring you a giveaway just to make sure you remember. 

The point of the giveaway is to raise awareness about this deadly disease as well as to raise money for breast cancer research in order to hopefully one day end it. And what better way to do that than to throw a whole bunch of PINK prizes your way to entice you to feel yourself up to check for lumps. That's right, feel yourself up by giving yourself a breast exam! Aka the only mandatory thing you'll need to do in order to enter for your chance to win. Win what you ask? Well let's take a little peek and see the prizes shall we.


1) A $300 gift card to Victoria's Secret PINK. Or just Victoria's Secret if you so choose. But either way you'll be getting TONS of new bras to carry those lovely lady lumps of yours around in. And with this much money you might even be able to snag some new panties and a bikini or two!

2) Over $100 worth of makeup and accessories. Snag yourself a lip duo from Sephora, a few blushes, nail polish, lip balms, a makeup bag, a watch, a scarf, a rose quartz and pearl bracelet, a pink pouf from Stella and Dot and more!

3) Over $100 worth of ad space. Get your pretty face on the sidebars of some awesome blogs in order to grow your own blog and gain more exposure.

4) $60 worth of Essie nail polish. You'll get five different pink polishes as well as base and top coats. Add in a pretty pink nail file and your digits will be thanking you for months to come.

5) A set of pink Vino2Go wine glass cups. Because what better way will there be to celebrate winning this giveaway than to sit down and pour yourself a glass (or two, or five) of wine.

6) A $25 design credit. After you're done shopping for new bras, painting your nails, applying makeup, throwing on new accessories and drinking wine, go update your blog with this awesome credit.









And now that you've met all of the amazingly generous ladies behind this giveaway, I think it's about time we got to entering it. So start stripping and begin feeling because the best method of prevention is early detection. If you've never given yourself an exam and need some guidance be sure to read the following information brought to you by the National Breast Cancer Foundation on the best ways to get the job done. If you already know how to get yourself to second base then carry on and head straight down to the Rafflecopter below to enter!


1) IN THE SHOWER
Using the pads of your fingers, move around your entire breast in a circular pattern moving from the outside to the center, checking the entire breast and armpit area. Check both breasts each month feeling for any lump, thickening, or hardened knot. Notice any changes and get lumps evaluated by your healthcare provider.

2) IN FRONT OF A MIRROR
Visually inspect your breasts with your arms at your sides. Next, raise your arms high overhead. Look for any changes in the contour, any swelling, or dimpling of the skin, or changes in the nipples. Next, rest your palms on your hips and press firmly to flex your chest muscles. Left and right breasts will not exactly match—few women's breasts do, so look for any dimpling, puckering, or changes, particularly on one side.

3) LYING DOWN
When lying down, the breast tissue spreads out evenly along the chest wall. Place a pillow under your right shoulder and your right arm behind your head. Using your left hand, move the pads of your fingers around your right breast gently in small circular motions covering the entire breast area and armpit. Use light, medium, and firm pressure. Squeeze the nipple; check for discharge and lumps. Repeat these steps for your left breast.

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Since the primary purpose of this giveaway is to spread awareness, the only thing that's mandatory in order to enter is for you to give yourself the breast exam. The second option available for entry (although definitely not mandatory) is to donate to the Susan G. Komen foundation. This option will get you the most entries because you'll be given an extra entry per every dollar you donate. A $20 donation equals 20 extra entries. Make sense? Good. So get to entering and find some pink fluffy feelings in your heart to help out a great cause!

a Rafflecopter giveaway


53 comments :

  1. None of it makes you a bad person... actually, the fact that you say "we" when ordering pizza and breadsticks makes you pretty damn awesome!

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  2. #5, literally did this last weekend. i even went as far as to pretend michael was in the house when the guy got there. im pretty much a yes to all of these so we can go to hell together.

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  3. #3. That doesn't make you a bad person...it just makes them a giant asshole.

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  4. #10. I'm a total ranter, too. Sometimes you just gotta get the feelings OUT! ;)

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  5. I always take more than one paper towel. And I don't let people over that take too long either...or the jerks who stay in the lane that is closed because of construction and there have been two bazillion signs stating this, but they stayed in that lane to try and avoid the traffic that everyone is sitting in...yeah you are NOT getting over buddy.

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  6. #3 = my biggest pet peeve! Just happened to me this morning.

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  7. You're only a bad person for the not recycling one. I'm a bad person for getting mad at people who don't recycle haha. But all the other ones are so me. Especially the not letting drivers over and the getting mad at girls I don't even know. Cough the model bitch that flaunts herself on Instagram that is dating Brody Jenner.

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  8. I'm a ranter, I can't help it. Matt gives me these awkward "what" looks..

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  9. If these make you a bad person, then I'm right there beside you because I agree with about 98.3% of these.

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  10. Guilty of #9 and #10 too. Not using hand sanitizer definitely does not make you a bad person. It's actually healthier not to use anti-bacterial things all the time. Unless you have an infection and need to take antibiotics, then please do. ha

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  11. I do NOT let people over who stay in the wrong lane too long. NOPE- gotta drive aggressively and awesomely in the city!! ;) LOL--- Also, as soon as I read the hand-sanitizer part, I used some. Guilty!!! haha

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  12. It's the stupid paper towel dispenser's fault for giving you four inches of towel to use to dry your hands! I use two (and by two I mean three or sometimes four) and never feel bad about it. And I never let people over who stay in the exit lane...but I also don't let anyone in front of me if they try to pass on the right. You know those people who think you're going slow but you're just stuck behind some other asshole and there's a semi in the right lane so you can't get in front of the asshole but then some other asshole tries to pass on the right and I'm like HELL NAW. Hold on, let me try and make this even longer.

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  13. i refuse to let people back into the left lane after they have tried to pass in the right lane like a D. also, ranting is my favvvvvorite.

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  14. Oh god . . . people who wait til the last second to change lanes - no. Their problem, not mine.

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  15. I always take two paper towels, one is never enough! Number 3 is why I hate commuting, so rude!! Stressed for me equals eating! Rant away girl!

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  16. Wait, what is wrong with being from Alabama?!

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  17. Haha I don't like girls from Alabama either. ;) Or Alabama for that matter. Mostly their football team. Yeah,I don't like their football team. GROSS. BARF.

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  18. I actually lose my appetite when I'm stressed, upset, angry - or feeling any negative emotion, really. Thankfully, I don't usually stay down in the dumps for long (ain't nobody got time fah' that), so I'm not the type to lose weight as a result, HOWWWWEVER, I do understand how it's possible. ;)

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  19. I do most of those things too. The hand towels. There is no way one's enough, unless you barely run your fingers under the water and then that's just gross! I also pretend it's more than just me when ordering. And now I want delicious pizza! Thanks! Oh and the ranting... that's definitely me!! It's just so much better to get it off your chest even if the person has no idea what you're talking about!

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  20. Please don't hate me because I'm from Alabama, I promise I'm not all that bad.. :) Oh, and the pizza ordering thing? Guilty.

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  21. Guilty of #9 but I justify it by Facebook stalking them to the point that I practically DO know them. I think that makes me a bad person.

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  22. I am definitely guilty of No. 3, but I don't think that makes us bad people. They're the bad people for doing that. THEY'RE THE BAD PEOPLE!!

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  23. It doesn't make you a bad person. I do everyone of those things, and some

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  24. BOOM. I hate the fact that a friend used to say, I loose more weight BY NOT working out. I wanted to slap a ho right there.

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  25. None of these make you a bad person! I agree with everything! ...or maybe that makes ME bad too...

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  26. It's a true story though! When I'm depressed I don't have an appetite at all. And when I'm stressed out I seriously forget to eat. I don't know how people can eat their feelings

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  27. haha!!

    I am a complete ranter too so I am with you on that one, the stressed out weight loss people - who are these people I definitely don't know them but I have heard they exist (elusive little things), and what is with the late lane changers?! Over here what bugs me is when people can see a lane closure cos of an accident or whatever from a mile away and wait until the last second to try and ram in front of me - no mr big shot in your mercedes jeep thing I will not move to let you in so stop trying to stare me out!!
    Believe this or not I had a guy in a BMW drive into my car in front of a policeman because I wouldn't let him push in front of me when he tried to skip the queue I'd waited in for half an hour! He drove into the side of my car literally accelerated into me - can you imagine the fury?! I yelled and screamed so much the policeman went 'I think this young lady and said all I would have and more, that's a fine for dangerous driving for you sir come with me please.' He was fined and I got my car fixed on his insurance!
    x

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  28. One that makes me an ... unpopular person, I guess ... I asked a cop friend of mine the other day how to report people for texting while driving. He didn't know. Now I feel dumb. But it pisses me off.

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  29. HA! I always try and cover up my large food splurges by saying we or even going so far as to say something about my boyfriend waiting for dinner at home. I don't think anyone is buying it.

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  30. #9 - DUDE! Is the Alabama remark football motivated? Because THAT I could understand.
    Other than that #9 is pretty accurate. I got pissed at a girl at jury duty because she was taller than me. Totally sane.

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  31. You're so right about ranting, but let's be real - sometimes, I can't calm down until I bitch for an hour. I also know exactly what you mean about people that ride in the exit lane for too long. I can't deal with those people.

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  32. I don't know how the rafflecopter works.. but I entered all my stuff THEN realized it's for US citizens only. I'm out! I think it's probably smart enough to exclude me.!
    Okay- I HATE those people that drive all the way to the front of the line and then want to be let in. It's SO annoying. Of course you take more than one piece of paper to dry your hands! Who doesn't!? That's like a total MUST. I do recycle but that's because it's really easy to do here, in B.C. We have blue bins and yellow bins, we even have to compost our garbage here. But I don't mind, because the weekly pick ups are easy enough to follow.. so there isn't that much extra crap in my carport!
    I have to admit that I am really paranoid about touching money.. without washing or sanitizing. I know, I know. But money is so so so so dirty. Yuck. So is my keyboard, I know... I definitely do not sanitize after touching my keyboard.. I eat and type at the same time. So look who is gross now....? :) (not that you were ever gross.. lol)

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  33. I don't know if they make you a bad person, but I think #9 means you have some internalized misogyny to deal with and #6 isn't very healthy and kind of directly relates to #5 - meaning you have some body image issues, too. I lose my appetite when stressed (or when it's hot outside) and I lost a lot of weight this summer (weight I shouldn't have lost and had no intention of losing). It happens to some people. Not to mention nausea is a common side effect of antidepressants. And I'm not embarrassed to order a lot of food for myself.

    I just always find that thinking kind of sad - it reminds me of the times I get comments like, "do you ever eat?" because I'm thin, and well, on the one hand I'm mad that I'm being judged for my weight when I'm healthy, but on the other hand I'm thinking, is the only way you'll feel good about your weight thinking people who are thinner than you starve themselves? Like that's so SAD to me. All body shapes are awesome!

    But the rest of the list, yeah, sounds pretty normal to me. ;)

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  34. Can I just say I fully agree with everything on your list. Especially the need for more than one paper towel. I swear they use a child's hands to see how many sheets are needed. I go as far as taking three and I refuse to feel bad about it.
    ~Krista
    kristiesbluejeans.blogspot.com

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  35. #3 is so true for Hawaii traffic. Like seriously, you knew that the Pali highway exit was coming up. Don't stop now, go around you idiot. LOL! You're not a bad person, just funny!

    xo Jess

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  36. There is nothing that annoys me more than the people who wait to change lanes until the actual merge point. If you know it's coming up, why do you have to cause even more traffic?! I NEVER let them over either.

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  37. i totally use the "we" when ordering delivery...i have even told my nonexistent takeout sharers that the food is here just to avoid judgment...that i'm now fully receiving by admitting this #dontcareilovecalzonesandthai

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  39. Umm #1. Agreed. My biggest pet peeve is when I used to go out clubbing and the self designated bathroom attendant [that sets up shop with smelly lotions, mousse, hairspray, gum, razors, anything you might need at a club] hands you a paper towel. I can get my own, thank you very much. And now you've gotta make it weird because I'm stuck between asking for more sheets of towels, or pretending that the 1 you handed me was enough. Either way, you still get no tip. #5 I love pizza. #7 YES. When I argue it's because I know I'm right, stop wasting my time with your point of view/answer. It's incorrect. #8 Agreed. I suck at basketball, which is why I don't play it...or like it. I hate any sport I suck at. Baseball...love. #9 & #10 agreed also, but I'm kind of over typing so there you go. Pretty much I agree with everything, lol.

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  40. "I'll never let a driver over who stayed in the lane that exits too long."

    THIS! ^ Ditto, girlfriend. Ditto.

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  41. #3 + #5 + #6 = we are soul mates. Yup. When I head to Dallas for a football game, it's so on. :)

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  42. These are so awesome! This whole list is just YES.

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  43. I'm so glad I'm not the only one who blames my insanely disgustly large food order on others - normally it's "um, I think my husband would like 'x' on his 'insert anything fattening and delicious here'" just to cover up my slobbish self. I must say this is generally an order on a day after a crazy night out where I'm terribly hungover.

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  44. 1, 5, 7, 9 & 10- YES! I'm can be a super bitch real quick like, and girls...ohh I don't like girls...sometimes for silly reason, and sometimes for no reason.
    And I am 100% a RANTER! (Hence my blog name, "Sissy Fits")
    Oh LAWD!
    So, no...none of this makes you a bad person!
    Or shit, if it does, I am right there with you sister!

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  45. I found myself nodding to just about every one of these. I totally pretend the pizza is for a group and not just for me.

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  46. I'm with you on all of those. Except the "we" thing. My pizza delivery people are sooo not worth impressing. We, as in me, myself and I want all the pizzas you got buddy!

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  47. I am excited about this giveaway for the blogging ad space!!

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  48. I'm an absolutely horrible person when it comes to letting a-holes in when they should have merged. What, you didn't see the 8 million signs??? This is part of the reason I didn't bring a car to Boston with me...

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  49. I agree with every point that applies to me, I am exactly the same.
    The worst one is people who say they lose weight from stress. I call bullsh*t!

    Kate | Diaries of a Essex Girl

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  50. Victoria Secret and Essie is my weakness

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  51. GIRL. facebook sends me into an all-out rage fest and it doesn't even remotely make sense.
    so i feel your pain.

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