Venus Trapped in Mars

28 December 2016

The 10 Things Experts Would Tell You Not To Do Each Morning

Thank you to RaceTrac for sponsoring this post!

In the morning before work, I probably do everything an "expert" would tell you is totally wrong. I hit snooze. Multiple times. So sue me.

In fact, I plan my whole morning around the number of times I get to hit snooze. Did I shower the night before? If so, that means I get one whole extra, blissful, delicious snooze all to myself. Even if that "blissful" extra snooze generally involves Veenie trying to lick inside my ear, while I try to push her back under the covers.... it's still better than being up and at 'em, IMO! 

Today, I'm kicking off a new partnership with RaceTrac to show you that there is no wrong way to start your morning. So what, you hit snooze! So what, the experts say you will literally combust if you hit snooze. So what, I'm not judging, nor is RaceTrac... it's all about whatever gets YOU going in the mornings.

Here are all the things I do wrong -- in the eyes of scientists (or Pinterest, as the case may be) -- to start my morning. I found this data chart on Pinterest showing how to be the best possible morning version of yourself.

Let's compare their notes to mine, shall we?

1. Drink a Glass Of Water Before Getting Out Of Bed
There is water in coffee, right? 

2. Stop Using Phone - turn off Wifi - an Hour Before Going To sleep 
I'm pretty sure I manage to use my phone DURING sleep. I use my phone all the way up until my last top eyelash connects with my bottom eyelash. Snapchat, Instagram Stories... these are my necessary nightly bedtime rituals. I don't have time during the day to watch snaps, so I do it right before bed, it's tradition. 

3. Rise with the Sun
Sunrise in Dallas: 7:29am
Commute to work: 40 minutes 
Required work arrival time: 8am
Your move mathletes on how I'll pull this one off.... 

4. Use a Dawn Simulator
I have absolutely zero idea what that is. Is that an app? You told me to turn off my wifi before bed, how am I supposed to use an app? You're setting me up for failure already, Pinterest. 

5. Put an Apple By Your Bedside so you Wake with a Crunch Each Morning 
I pass this one with flying colors, my APPLE iPhone never leaves my side.  
Hah, Sarah- 1, Pinterest- 0 

6. Wake Up At the Right Point in your Sleep Cycle
Again, these people must not commute to work....

7. Get Out of Bed and Exercise 
In my 30 years on this planet, I have probably gotten up before work to exercise 3 total times and it was horrific each time. Never again. I'll wait until the afternoon because, sleep. 

8. Get Up Progressively Earlier, Shift Your Wake Up Time by 5 min Each Week
OK WHY? I've perfectly timed my snooze schedules to be in a frantic rush every single morning and that works for me. Correct me if I'm wrong, but a rushed, total panic is quite the effective caffeine compliment.

9. Switch to a red lampshade at night 
With all due respect... and I'm saying with all due respect, that is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. 

10. Snooze you lose. Keep your phone far enough away so you have to get out of bed to turn it off.
BAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA.
LOLS.
Hilar. Keep it up Pinterest, totes the funniest ever. 






One thing I love about RaceTrac is that they (sunny) side (up) with me (YIKES, at that joke) --- there is no wrong way to start your morning! 

Some people want coffee, some people want a diet coke. Some people like a grab and go breakfast bar (me), some people want a hot dog, some people want donuts.  Whatever it is you need in the morning to get you work ready, RaceTrac has that! 

This might blow your mind, but Nathan's Famous 100 percent all-­‐beef hot dogs are RaceTrac's top selling food item from 6am to 10am! They don't just grill up hot dogs for sale in the morning hours though, they have taquitos, chicken roller bites and tamales. Want to take a more traditional route in the morning? RaceTrac offers a massive coffee bar selection of fresh brewed coffee (hazelnut, regular, columbian, decaf and dark roast) plus all of your favorite creamers, sweeteners and toppings so you can be your own barista. If you prefer a healthy, grab and go option, they have fresh cut fruit, wraps and sandwiches that you can easily snag and take with you to work!




So, if you're like me and unabashedly hit the snooze over and over and sometimes like to drink diet soda first thing in the morning, RaceTrac is there for you, totally judgement free! 

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